Good Cut

Every year I rediscover how bad I am at wrapping things in colored paper. I guess I am really bad. I don,t understand how people can wrap a cube and have it still look like a cube. All of my cubes look like partially deflated sports balls. I should have bought a bunch of partially deflated sports balls for people.

My Death Cab For Cutie cover band played a show in a freezing cold bicycle garage the other night. The floor was so wet. Most of the people there were wearing all black. I don,t think I looked serious enough to be allowed to be there. I almost backed my car into a bike that was chained to a pole. I saw Justin Bieber stockings at a gas station that were on sale for thirteen dollars.

Jay Reatard - Blood Visions I think I wiggled a bit too much that night. My entire body doesn,t work anymore. I don,t know what,s happening. My thighs hurt somehow. I don,t know if that is related to wiggling, though. I think that might be from crossing my legs super hard when I,m at work. I,m crossing them right now. I uncrossed them. I bet this is what riding a horse feels like.

I wonder if anybody has ever gone to the hospital because they wiggled too much or too vigorously. Maybe I,ll be the first. I,m not really going to go to the hospital. I made soup. That,s nature,s hospital. I think cans of soup should say that on the label. It would probably help the diminishing soup industry. Soup used to be the only food.