All of you Beasts of Burden know how bad I am at keeping jobs right? Right. Last summer I had a job for three days at this hotel where not so famous comedians hung out. It was way too boring and I,m a free spirit. The only good part was that one of the three days I got to work with a greaser, you know, the guys that look like the band Lit in that video for the only hit song they had. Did anybody else have that record? I did. They all had flaming dice tattoos and slicked back hair and cool belts and thick boots. That video they did with Pamela Anderson was rad though. She is the most important girl in history. The other good thing about that job is that we sold biker porn mags and I had to rip the covers off when we were throwing them away which meant I had to expose this picture of some girl getting a peepee wiggled into her fanny by a tough biker that was on the first page. I was working with some old lady that shift.
Frederic Chopin - Waltzes
I got this job a few weeks ago waving a lightsaber (I just had to look up if that was one word or not because I knew if I spelled it wrong the dorkier Beasts would kick my ass) around and getting yelled at by punkers. I worked weekend shifts from 7pm to 3am. It was wack. The guy I worked with always smelled like McDonalds and cigarettes and fat girlfriend and unplanned childbirth. He was a bummer. He would listen to this weird mp3 player and yell lyrics to Sublime songs and rave twist with his lightsabers.
So I quit after working four days. One day longer than my last job that I quit. The dudes were just too greasy and I,d rather be a pauper than an asshole, you know? On my last day my sweetheart came by and we set up a mini ramp and did skate tricks in front of my boss. He was slightly impressed with my Tony Hock 1080 Snowboarding flips. Then we had dinner and I got paid for it. I met a gay black guy at dinner. My sweetheart is jealous of how tall he is.
Love,
Fine Fine Fine, Very Good Very Good Very Good, Very Very Very Very Good
