It was decided immediately that one should eat a girl. I think the joke was because it would be gay to have a guy in your mouth but the truth is that girls generally have a better fat-to-muscle ratio. You don,t want to eat somebody who looks like me - an emaciated, hairy, ghoulish idiot. For one thing, there would hardly be any meat. Secondly, it would smell like burnt hair. It would be a mess. Realizing this put all of my fears of being eaten to rest.
We decided that the best type of girl to eat would be one of the girls that was on the basketball team. Those girls were constantly moving, constantly building muscle, and many of them were kind of overweight. Maybe they used to be trim but they got dumped by their boyfriend and sort of let themselves go. Whatever the reason, they had now become the apple in the pig,s mouth of my eye. Those were the ones we thought would make the best meal.
The reason we decided that chubby girls would be the best is because of what we knew about beef. People say that the more fat that is spread throughout the meat, the more tender and flavorful it will be. This is known as marbling and we figured that it was probably the same for high school girls. All of this is going to be submitted as evidence in court when I finally get in trouble for doing something bad. I,m writing my own prison sentence.
I think by the time we picked out two or three specific girls who we would eat, class was about to end and we had not listened to anything the tiny Asian teacher had said and we had not done any work. It was probably for the best that we stopped talking about it though because we are gross and shouldn,t be allowed to express that openly around other minors.
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