Hitting

All I ever do anymore is eat muffins. It,s great. I learned how to make them recently and I just keep doing it. I had three this morning and I,ll probably have another one later. I,m truly living the American dream. I get paid to do nothing and I eat muffins whenever I want. Also, I have to poop. I think that is integral to the American dream.

My Death Cab For Cutie cover band started recording another album the other day which is absolutely insane since we just finished recording two months ago. What a small group of morons we are. What,s even better is that we are paying for this ourselves rather than swindling our bosses to pay for it and, on top of that, it really does sound like we,re a Death Cab For Cutie cover band now. Usually, it sounds like we,re a Nirvana cover band, but not today.

El Guincho - Pop Negro I have no idea what is going to happen with this new record. It,s very possible that nothing is going to happen. I can,t really imagine our benevolent dictators to be so benevolent as to agree to buy this record from us even though it doesn,t sound anything like our band. We will see. If they don,t like it, I guess we will just have bought ourselves an incredibly expensive joke. It,s good to do that sometimes. It,s good to waste money that you don,t have.

It,ll probably take forever to finish this one. We wanted the last one done in two weeks and it took four so this one will probably take nine months since we,re not giving ourselves a deadline. Also, our friend who records everything for us knows that we,re not paying him very much so I am certain that this is not a priority for him. It shouldn,t be. He,d be a fool and I wouldn,t want to record with him if it were.

Hot Plastic

I think my television is broken. I have to run some more tests to be totally sure, but I think it,s broken for good. It still turns on and everything, but any dark colors turn into weird cubes. My TV is racist now and refuses to let anything that isn,t white show its full potential. I wish my things would stop breaking and/or being racist.

When I got back from my punishment trip, I found a bunch of mail piled on my front step. One mail was for me, but the big tube mail was definitely not for me. It,s addressed to my apartment, but not my name. It,s a very big tube so I can,t just throw it back in a mailbox and expect it to go away. I don,t know what to do with it. I already have more than enough tubes. I have too many tubes. I don,t want another.

Michael Cera - True That The best part about that trip I took last week was that I bought a shirt in a thrift store hundreds of miles away from my home that says, ,,Powell Family Reunion 2012,, and has a weird picture of some creature barbecuing meat for a smaller creature on it. It,s great. The picture reminds me of Ping Pong von Laserstein if he were into grilling meat.

Now that I,m back, I have to get a job. I mean, I don,t have to, but I should if I know what,s good for me and I do know what,s good for me because I,m smart. There is one job that is almost always available near me. I can get paid minimum wage to sit in a box with a bunch of morons and call other morons and ask their opinions about things. It sounds soul crushing, but it would mean that I wouldn,t have to waste my life savings on rent each month. I could also take longer showers and use the oven sometimes.

I Do Not Like The Smell Of It

I have to go to San Francisco tomorrow. I have to go there for a meeting for work. I have ridiculous facial hair right now. I am going to look like a crazy person and they,re going to fire me. I get paid for gas and tolls and time though. So it,ll all be worth it. If I don,t get paid for parking, it will not all be worth it. I had better get money for that or I,ll be losing my job for nothing.

The meeting is about my health insurance. I think it will be very boring. I hope they have snacks. I hope they have poppy seed muffins that aren,t very sweet. I used to work photographing college graduations with my friend and we would have to get there really early - way before the ceremony started. There was a room in the back where they would have breakfast food for all of the crew and we would go back there and eat a bunch of stuff and then throw stuff at the walls when nobody else was in there.

Midnight Star - Planetary Invasion We were both adults when we did this. We weren,t in high school. I must have been twenty and my friend is older than I am. We got paid to tell people where to stand to get their picture taken before they got their diploma and throw strawberries at a wall and make them explode. That,s what I hope the meeting is like tomorrow. I want to throw some food at a thing. I haven,t done that while getting paid in a long time. Last night at work, I threw a noodle in the trash, but it wasn,t the same because it was a dirty noodle. I want to waste good food and make money. That,s the American dream.

I need to try and figure out something fun to do while I,m down there. Maybe I,ll eat some food. Maybe I,ll visit a friend. Maybe I,ll try to sell drawings outside of the MOMA. I think that,s how Michelangelo got his start. His full name was Michelangelo Jackson.