Vegetarian

I,m sure I have mentioned several times that I live below horrible, gigantic beasts of burden. They are awful creatures who are extremely loud and gross. They weigh a combined total for fourteen hundred pounds and just the act of them standing makes the building feel like it is about to collapse. I call the police on them sometimes.

They are too large and horrendous to use a shower properly. They didn,t have a door or curtain on their shower for several months and eventually the water that rained from their swollen, sausage bodies made its way through their floor and through our ceiling onto our floor. I called the landlord repeatedly until he agreed to have an industrial strength door put on their shower so they could no longer pour gallons of water directly onto the floor.

This worked for a few months but the ceiling is leaking again. I guess the awful monsters learned how to use tools like the dinosaur does in Jurasic Park and then the guy says, ,,Clever girl.,, I,m assuming that they removed the door so their body meats wouldn,t be so cramped. How big is an average bathtub? The internet says that the average bathtub is thirty by sixty inches. That means that they are more than five feet wide. That,s true.

Ernst Reijseger - Cave Of Forgotten Dreams
They,ll probably never fix that leak. The drywall on the ceiling will fall through and I will be left shivering, cold, covered in dead bats, and staring up an eight hundred pound woman,s creased parts. ,,Creased parts,, is a pretty delicate way to describe the genital region of a human pile.

I also haven,t been able to get my mail for the past few days. For several months, the mail key or mailbox has been sort of ruined and it,s been extremely difficult to get it open. Now, finally, it won,t work at all. I called the landlord today and he said that they would get me a new one but I don,t think that will happen. I asked them to take my last roommate off of the lease almost a year ago and they still haven,t sent me any paperwork for it. I hope I get something live delivered to me and it dies in the mailbox and then that will be on their conscience. I,ll mail them the dead eagle that somebody sends me once I finally get it out of there and they,ll have to eat it just like in the olden days.