My Friends

My face has been twitching for several days. At first it was a small twitch in my left eyelid. Then it moved to my nose. It has been stationed there for quite some time now. I don,t know why this happens, but I assume it has to do with my body shutting down because I didn,t buy any groceries with my last paycheck and have been going out to eat constantly. You shouldn,t eat things that are cooked by other people all the time. You,ll die.

I don,t know why I chose to do that for this past week. It is very unlike me. I like going out to eat but I don,t like spending money. I am an idiot. It hasn,t even been that enjoyable. I don,t think I would like going out to eat all the time even if I could afford it. It,s making my nose twitch. My farts have also been extremely foul lately but they are always that way so I am not attributing it to my change in diet. I just wanted to brag about the horrible poison that comes out of me.
Jesu - Conqueror
I went to the hospital the other day so they could tell me if removing my testicles really made me sterile or not. There were so many people there. It was gross. There was a middle age woman who had greased ropes for hair, no bra, and a shirt that said ,,I put the PRO in Procrastinate,, and I think that shirt was correct. I bet her hungry children appreciated that shirt when she refused to make them dinner because she was too drunk.

I should have asked the receptionist who took my disgusting cup of goo why my nose was twitching. She would have known. That,s her job. I felt bad for her. There was only a thin plastic cup and a paper bag separating her from my poison. It was good though, I found out that the world will never have to deal with a younger version of me again. You,re all welcome, idiots.