At The Same Time

I have to go to a big, filthy music festival this weekend. My Death Cab For Cutie cover band is playing. I wouldn,t be going otherwise. There is no way I,d pay one hundred dollars to be surrounded by loud people in t-shirts who I don,t like or respect. I wouldn,t even do that if it only cost ten dollars.

Luckily, it costs negative dollars. That means that we tricked those big wigs into giving us money to suffer in the dirt and heat for a day. What a bunch of generous fools. I can,t understand why they let us do this. There is no way we are going to make them any money. They,re losing a ton of money because of us.

DJ Richard - Grind Maybe they know that. Maybe that,s why they,re making us play at the absolute worst possible time. We play on a Sunday morning. Everybody is going to be in church while we play. It,ll be pretty bizarre to play on a weird stage during the day to nobody. We usually play in a small room at night to nobody. At least one of the three variables will be the same. That,ll make it a little more comfortable.

I,m most excited about getting free food there. I assume that there is going to be free food for bands. I imagine it as a sort of trough system. All the bands line up and feed from the trough or ,,long bucket,, as they call it. I can,t wait to sneeze on everything.