Extra Hair

This is a bizarre week. I just had to pay a bunch of weird bills all at once so I am completely out of money. That,s not that weird. That happens kind of regularly. What,s weird is that I didn,t work on Monday so I am constantly confused about what day, time, and month it is.

I have a carton of rotten eggs in my refrigerator and I almost ate all twelve of them last night because I didn,t know what month it was. I almost died. This is just one of the many, many times where my lack of knowledge has almost killed me. To be fair though, I think that is the only real cause of death. If you knew everything, you,d probably never die. If you knew everything, you,d probably want to die more than anybody else. That,s the trade off.

Giraffage - No Reason I haven,t been able to sleep recently. What a lie. I have been able to sleep, but not very well. It,s too hot and when it,s too hot, my brain juices boil and I can,t sleep because the juice fumes stink. I try to point a fan at my face to blow the stench away from me, and that kind of works, but I wake up shortly after falling asleep because the fan dries out the inside of my nose so much that my boogers turn into razor sharp crystals and cut my nostrils and blood gets everywhere. I,ve been sleeping in the bathtub because cleanup is easier that way.