A Long Nap

I think my friend is supposed to come live with me soon. Maybe he,ll be here today or tomorrow. He lived with us before and it was great. All he did was bang chicks. He had to sleep on the couch so he would bang them in the living room and I would walk out there when they were in the middle of it and act like I wanted to get some water or something. I wonder how often he jerked off on the couch. Probably a lot. He lived with use for four months. That,s why we had to get a new couch cover after he left. It felt really crunchy.

Then he got too good for us and his free living situation and decided to move to a big city to pursue his dreams of working in a dumb bar and record store. He really made it big. I bet he made out with girls while he was at work. He,s that kind of guy - suave, handsome, debonair, drugs girls. Whatever get,s the job done, right? He probably doesn,t drug girls. I don,t know. The last time I hung out with him and a girl together he didn,t drug her but he also didn,t fist them either so who knows what he would have done had he not been watched by his current landlord/oldest friend.

DJ Nate - Da Trak Genious
He usually likes girls with dyed hair and tattoos. He used to live with one girl that had a lot of tattoos. We all went and saw Henry Rollins yell about something together. Somebody pulled the fire alarm because Henry Rollins is an annoying bully. That girl he lived with was pretty nice but she may have been a robot or at least part robot. She had a robot name and I think she never went swimming because of her circuitry or motherboard or something. I can,t remember. I didn,t see her that much.

Even if she wasn,t a robot, he is still coming to stay on our couch again and cover it in his precious seed. It,s what he does best. When he lived here before, he thought pouring coffee on my computer would be a cool thank you for letting him stay here rent free. It was a nice gesture but he could have just bought me a sandwich or something and I would have been happier about it. Oh well. It,ll be nice to have him back. I,m going to secretly watch him have so much sex.