It Aches

My Death Cab For Cutie cover band had our first real record come out today. That,s pretty neat. I haven,t even seen the album. I guess I,m not one hundred percent sure that it,s not all a big joke yet. The pictures I,ve seen could be fake. You can fake pretty much anything these days. I recently gave somebody some of my pee so he could fake his way into a job that required him not to be addicted to drugs.

I feel like a fat, greasy baby right now for very strange reasons. There is absolutely nothing wrong. Things are very nice and I am happy and I am going to get to eat a cool sandwich in about an hour, but I still feel like a warm turd. I,m pretty sure it,s because I recently enjoyed myself too much. I had too much fun and did too many good things all within a short period of time so now that I,m back to having a good time rather than an excellent time, things don,t feel as cool.

Nicolas Jaar - Nymphs II I guess that,s why people keep doing drugs after the first time. That first rip of the bong is so intense that you spend the rest of your adolescence looking for that same, smelly high. That just proves that happiness and satisfaction and comfort are all drugs and they should all be outlawed.

If it were up to me, happiness would only be available with a prescription. Possession of illegal happiness would be punishable by strict fines and/or jail time. Trafficking happiness could get you up to thirty years. Repeat offenders would be shot in the streets. Happiness would cost millions of dollars and would only be available to the world,s wealthiest, ugliest elite.