Smiling

I just went and hung out in a dumb beach town for two days. It was full of homeless people with deteriorating faces and bad attitudes. I ate nothing but giant burritos and my body is now an uncomfortable diarrhea machine at this point. I love it. I only got called a faggot once which was surprising and I didn't even get beaten up or anything.

My friend got us this rad freetel (that,s the new phrase for free hotel). Of course I stayed up way too late and watched some show about a mean fish and Food Network. That was pretty great. Somebody peed their pants next to the pool like it wasn,t no thang. It wasn,t. We went to the beach and walked around looking at horrible people. They were all sufficiently horrible.

I didn,t want to spend a ton of money on food so my friend and I bought a Tombstone and went to some kid,s house to cook it. They had a surprisingly clean oven for the amount of rabbit poop on the ground. Everybody was barefoot and smoking weed the whole time and didn,t get any of the hilarious jokes I kept telling. Their loss.

J Spaceman - Silent Sound
The next day we didn,t know what to do and we didn,t have a place to be since we had to leave the freetel. We were treated to a free breakfast of hard boiled eggs, tomato juice, and cold oatmeal to start our day. After our feast we drove around aimlessly and ended up hanging out at my favorite Safeway. Then we went back to rabbit poop house and sat in the sun. Later we slept next to a pool while a woman made out of a garbage bag half filled with jellyfish pointed her dumper at us.

That night my dumb band played a show at that house. A bunch of collegers came. You could tell they were collegers by the lighters smashed in between boobs, the overwhelming stink of Axe Body Mist that filled the tiny room, and the way that the girls there tried to sop up spilled beer with their bare feet. It was sufficiently horrible. We played a bunch of Minor Threat songs and I told more hilarious jokes before, during, and after we played but people still didn,t get them. Some girl passed out and smashed her face on a keyboard though. That was pretty good. She maintained that she was just really tired and fell asleep for a second. She sure convulsed a lot for just sleeping but maybe that,s how people do it down there.